Conquering the Darkness
by HardyBoyz4Eva
Summary: As requested by the readers, the story of Kelly. The Shield Slash. Seth has suffered his fifth miscarriage and is feeling lower than ever. There is a great possibility that Seth cannot conceive again, and an even greater one that another miscarriage could mean the end of everything. Full list of warnings inside. Please Review!
1. Introduction

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anyone.  
**Rated:** M  
**Warning(s):** Slash, Threesome, Mpreg, Self-Harm, etc.

* * *

"No..." Seth trailed, hot, wet tears streaming down his cheeks as he watched the crimson blood swirl down the drain. One hard fall in the ring had cost him everything. Not even two months into his latest pregnancy, he'd already miscarried. That brought the total to five.

Five miscarriages. He felt like a foolish dreamer, actually thinking that he could carry a baby to term after the _first_ time. While on NXT, when he had first met Roman and Dean, he'd misjudged a moonsault and landed stomach-first on a metal chair. The resulting D&C had led the doctor to claim that it would nearly be impossible for him to conceive again. But as he soon realized, conception wasn't his problem. With the new storyline concerning Daniel Bryan, Seth was taking a lot of abuse. He'd only known about the baby for two weeks, maybe three...

As soon as Daniel had kicked him in the stomach, he'd known. He'd barely made it to the locker room before the blood started flowing. He'd carefully stripped off his clothes before entering the shower stall, before falling to the tile floor and letting the tears fall. Everything hurt. And he couldn't help but crumble at the idea of telling Dean and Roman that, yet again, he'd miscarried. Hell, he hadn't even told them about the baby yet, and now he would be telling them about _another_ miscarriage. It was a tired cycle and he was so, so done...

Seth peered down at his wrists, ridden with scars from the four other failed pregnancies. Why did he always approach everything with such optimism? Why couldn't he just face the facts - that even if he were to get pregnant, it was highly improbable that he'd carry to term? His eyes fell down to the spiraling pink water once more. He knew that he should be angry, furious even, with Daniel... if he had never kicked him, none of this would have happened... but he couldn't bring himself to feel much of anything at all. All he felt was _empty_.

Two shadows appeared in the opening of the showers, and Seth could only assumed that these shadows belonged to Dean and Roman. This was only solidified by Dean's voice echoing through the chamber, "Seth? Seth, baby, are you in here?"

"I-I'm in h-h-here." Seth said, sniffling. He rubbed at his eyes, reaching weakly to turn off the water and try to hide the blood. Just as his fingertips touched the knob, the shadows appeared in the mouth of the cubicle. Out of the corner of his eye, Seth could see their eyes on the blood.

And every emotion felt in that room seemed to be summed up in the incredibly weak plea of, _"Seth..."_


	2. Watching and Waiting

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anyone.  
**Rated:** M  
**Warning(s):** Slash, Threesome, Mpreg, Self-Harm, etc.

* * *

"_Seth..._ Seth, what happened?" Dean scrambled into the shower stall, not even caring about his fully-clothed state. He was fully soaked by the time he was able to turn off the water. "Seth?" The two-toned wrestler continued to stare at the floor, tears dripping silently down his face. "Seth? C'mon, Seth."

Roman entered behind Dean, bearing a towel. Neither Dean nor Seth knew when he'd left, but it didn't warrant much thought at that moment. Carefully, Roman knelt down, patting Seth's skin dry. "You're shivering, Seth." He said monotonously, his attention never diverting from his task.

"The water was freezing." Dean said, unable to hold back a shiver of his own. "What were you thinking, Seth? You could've gotten seriously sick, or worse." Gently, Dean reached forward, brushing a blond tress behind Seth's ear. "Seth? C'mon, talk to us. We only want to help you. _Please_."

"I... I lost it..." Seth mumbled, his body trembling with the sheer force of his sobs. Breaking out of Roman's hold, he pulled himself into a tiny ball and cried.

"Seth..." Dean's breathy declaration was all the confirmation Seth needed - they knew _exactly_ what he'd lost.

Dean gently pulled Seth out of his ball and curled him into his arms, wrapping his arms as tightly around the smaller wrestler as he dared. Roman continued patting him dry, and once he finished, he wrapped the towel around Seth's lower body and rose to his feet. Dean followed closely behind, easing Seth onto his back and carrying him bridal-style. Seth buried his face into the crook of Dean's neck, inhaling the scent of Dial soap and 'after-the-rain' scented shampoo. He was still bleeding, but it was significantly slower now. His sobs, however, were as strong as ever. They were so forceful he often forgot to breathe, and would find himself a gasping, choking mess.

There were many questions floating between them, but none that they dared ask. Seth was in an incredibly fragile state of mind, dancing the fine line between sanity and a complete mental breakdown. All he'd ever wanted was a child of his own, and it seemed like the universe continually sought to stand in his way. Four of the five times, he'd lost the baby in a match. The set time in the pregnancy for maternity leave was six months - the furthest he'd ever gotten was four and a half. His third miscarriage, however, had been the hardest to bear for all three of them. _Nothing_ had happened. He'd been laying in bed, and woken up in blood. They'd never figured out why.

Dean was the brave soul to ask the first question. "How long did you know, Seth?"

"T-Three weeks." Seth stuttered, rubbing at his eyes. "I was... I was p-planning on tell-telling you t-tonight."

"Shh... my poor baby." Dean stroked Seth's hair gently, planting firm, yet comforting kisses on his head. Seth leaned into him, squeezing his eyes closed to try and staunch the flow of tears. "It's okay... Shh, I know it hurts... But it's gonna be okay. It always turns out okay, huh? This time won't be any different."

Roman was pulling out a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt for the smaller man. Seth watched, feeling his heart sink further. "He k-kicked me and I lost... I l-lost the b-baby."

"We know. Shh... You don't have to say anything else... Just hush now, baby. Let us take care of you, okay? Let us take care of you." Dean said.

Seth sucked in a deep breath. "I don't... I don't _want_ to try again. I don't... is that wrong?"

Dean raked his fingers through Seth's hair. "No, it's not wrong. We'll be more careful, okay? We'll try anything you want - condoms, birth control, whatever." If Seth didn't want to endure that kind of pain, he'd never be forced to go through it again. "Just tell us what you want, what you _need_."

"I hate to interrupt this little love-fest here." Roman's grumbling voice interrupted them. Dark brown eyes flickered between his two lovers, before he held up the clothes. "But you can't really head out to the rental naked. Put some clothes on so that we can head back to the hotel."

"Way to be compassionate, Roman." Dean chastised, watching as Roman tossed the clothes at the smaller man.

"You want some random stranger staring at his ass?" There was a dark flash of primal jealousy in Dean's eyes. "That's what I thought."

Seth listened to them bicker as he carefully dressed himself. He was still feeling an uncomfortable pressure in his lower abdomen, but was thankful to see that the flow of blood had almost stopped completely. Truth be told, they hadn't even been trying to get pregnant _this_ time. They'd used condoms, but it was a well-known fact that condoms aren't one-hundred percent effective. There was no real one-hundred percent effective method, except maybe a vasectomy, and he certainly wouldn't ask them to do that. It seemed pointless and almost cruel, especially considering the fact that there was no guarantee that it could be reversed.

Once Seth was dressed, he offered a weak sniffle. "I'm ready to go back to the hotel room."

Dean grabbed the bags, tossing them over his shoulder and heading toward the door. Roman followed close behind, and was the first to notice that Seth was not behind him. He turned back, "What? Do you need an invitation?"

Seth extended his arms, much like a child would to their parent. "Carry me, please? I really don't want to walk."

Roman turned around, walking back over to Seth and picking him up, tossing Seth's body over his shoulder. This wasn't exactly what Seth had in mind when it came to being 'carried', but it wasn't exactly uncomfortable. His arms hung limply over Roman's back and Roman's right arm hooked tight around Seth's legs. Seth set his head between Roman's strong shoulder blades, watching as the muscles in Roman's back rippled beneath his t-shirt. He closed his eyes, allowing himself to be comforted by a scent that was uniquely Roman. Before he even knew what was happening, he'd fallen asleep in Roman's rather awkward embrace...

* * *

Seth sat between Roman's legs on their bed, a re-run of General Hospital playing out on the television screen. It had been three hours after the events of the locker room, and after another shower back at the hotel, Seth felt somewhat better. He'd taken two Tylenol, afraid to take anything more, and was now sipping hot herbal tea and making Roman's life a living hell. Every time he started to doze off, Seth would start to sob at some horrible occurrence on the soap opera and Roman would snap awake, holding him tightly and gently shushing him - all the while, wishing to put a bullet through the television screen.

"Roman." Seth sniffled, taking another sip of his tea and having to hold it with both hands for fear of dropping it. "I know that you want to go to sleep. It's three in the morning. Just go to sleep. I'll be fine."

"Can't do that, Seth." Roman immediately shot the idea down. "I promised I'd stay awake with you until six, when Dean gets up. I don't go back on my word."

Seth's dark eyes fell on Dean's sleeping form. His eyes then flickered up to Roman's face, which was pinched with exhaustion. "You're watching to make sure that I don't... hurt myself again, aren't you?"

Roman shook his head immediately, but his eyes told a different story. "I'm staying up to watch the General Hospital re-runs with you."

Seth blinked dumbly. "Even _I_ can tell that that is a load of bull. You hate soap operas." Seth said, more tears threatening to fall. "Please, don't lie to me."

Roman didn't say a word. If he remained silent, he wouldn't have to lie to him. Seth looked at him hopefully, awaiting an answer that he would never receive. Roman sighed, leaning forward and kissing Seth's forehead, before pulling him back to rest against his stomach. This was an incredibly uncomfortable situation for him - he truly wanted to comfort Seth and make him feel better, but that sort of behavior simply wasn't in his nature. Add this to the fact that Seth thought they didn't trust him now, and he felt like a total ass. But he couldn't tell Seth the truth. The truth could be even more destructive than a lie.

Suddenly, Seth turned the television off. "I don't want to watch TV anymore." He said, his voice low and trembling.

"Okay." Roman said slowly, not quite sure what to make of this sudden revelation. "What do you want to do, then?"

Carefully, Seth climbed out from between Roman's legs, placing one hand on his abdomen. It still hurt, even after the Tylenol. "I want to take a walk. You don't..." Seth shrugged meekly, "You don't have to come with, if you don't want to."

"I'll come, I'll come." Roman said, climbing off of the bed as well. "But... you do realize it is three in the morning, right?"

"Like I said, you can stay and sleep. I just need some fresh air."

Seth made it all the way out to the hallway before Roman caught up to him. Feeling a bigger hand interlock with his own, Seth turned around and offered Roman a shaky, watery smile. Such a public display of affection was usually rare from someone like Roman, but these were unique and unusual circumstances. Roman walked them over to the elevator, before hitting the 'down' button. In a matter of seconds, the elevator arrived to take them to the first floor of the hotel. However, no sooner had the door opened than the distinctive screams of an infant hit their ears. Roman braced for the inevitable fall-out.

It got even better when the doors fully opened, revealing a woman with three children who all looked to be under five. Seth let out a choked sob as the screaming baby stared at him - she was all blonde hair and green eyes, and if she hadn't been the child of that woman, she would've been an undeniable mixture of himself and Dean. Seth took a deep breath, squeezing his eyes closed to staunch the flow of tears. Pulling Roman along behind him, they entered the elevator and stood a considerable distance away from the woman and her children. The minute they stepped out of the elevator, the relief became palpable.

As the doors slid closed once more, Seth leaned forward and hit the emergency stop button. The elevator jolted to an uneasy stop, and Roman turned to face his submissive, the look on his face equally uneasy. "Roman?" Roman grunted in response. "If I were to ask you something, would you answer me honestly?"

At this, Roman looked even more uneasy. Nevertheless, he nodded. "I don't lie, Seth."

"Would you still love me... even if I'm broken?" Seth asked weakly. His whole body was trembling, and he had to forcibly restrain himself from crying. "I don't know why I can't carry to term... did I do something wrong? Is it my fault?" He'd lost that battle, and the tears were falling now. "Even if I can't have kids, would you still love me?"

"You didn't do anything wrong, Seth. None of this is your fault. And the way that Dean and I feel about you doesn't depend on whether or not you can have kids."

"I w-want a baby." Seth cried.

Roman backed him against the wall of the elevator, pressing their foreheads together gently. "I know that you do, baby. But I also know that you said you didn't want to try again. While I don't think you should just give up entirely, it can't hurt to take a break and let your body heal."

"I'm broken, Roman." Even as he said this, Roman vehemently denied the fact that he was 'broken'. "I just want someone to show me that I'm still worth something."

"I keep telling you that you're not broken, but you won't listen to me. I have a feeling I know what you want me to show you, and I can't do that, because I'll hurt you."

"The only thing that is hurting me right now is _you_." Seth sniffled, yanking his hand out of Roman's.

Roman blinked, surprise etched onto his features. A rush of pain flashed through his body at the very idea of hurting Seth, mentally or physically. Roman took a step closer, trying to bridge the sudden gap between them, when he noticed Seth cowering from him. Seth just knew him too well. He knew every little intricacy about him, every little way to make him break down. Because, even if Roman was the muscle of the group, that didn't make him invincible. When it came to Seth, in fact, he was incredibly vulnerable - he just didn't know how to show it. Which was why he found himself leaning in, pinning Seth to the elevator wall, and kissing him for all he was worth.

* * *

**A/N: **As stated in the summary, this is the story of Kelly, the daughter of Roman and Seth of the Shield. This story was created by popular demand. I'm excited to hear your feedback on it, and you can look forward to a new chapter ASAP.


	3. Come Home

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anyone.  
**Rated:** M  
**Warning(s):** Slash, Threesome, Mpreg, Self-Harm, etc.

* * *

Roman didn't fully understand what it was that he was doing. He didn't know when, or how, Seth had acquired such power over him, but he knew that, on a deeper level, he was incredibly uncertain about what he was about to do. Seth was still incredibly fragile - both physically and mentally - and had only recently stopped bleeding. What if he tore or ruptured something? What if he hurt Seth in some invisible, unfathomable way, and Seth was never able to fully trust him again? Roman, never one to truly be _emotional_, suddenly found himself overwhelmed by the emotions swirling about in his head.

But he did it, unsure of what else he could do. If he backed away now, Seth would never forgive him. Fingers lazily tracing across the hem of Seth's shirt, he snuck beneath it, placing gentle pressure on the sensitive skin that resided there. Seth moaned, but it sounded far from pained. His hips, thrusting forward, pressed firmly against Roman's. His obvious arousal, poorly concealed within his baggy sweatpants, teased the bulge in Roman's own pajama bottoms. Another moan, this one slightly more frantic, and Seth's hands were weaving their way into Roman's pajama bottoms. They both needed this so, so badly.

And that was when it happened. Seth broke the kiss - one hand sneaking into the front of Roman's pajama bottoms, cupping his erection - and Roman started, thumbs pressing a little too hard into the still-sensitive flesh of Seth's abdomen. The two-toned man jumped, a huff of air escaping his lungs, quickly followed by a pained whine. Immediately upon hearing the sound, Roman withdrew. He placed a considerable amount of space between them, before re-tying the front of his pajama bottoms. Still huffing out pained breaths, Seth wiped his mouth on his arm, his shirt slowly rolling down over his aching abdomen.

"What the hell?" Seth exclaimed, eyes ablaze. He pushed off of the wall and started to approach Roman, only to find the larger Samoan taking considerable steps back, until it was _Seth_ that had backed _Roman_ into the corner. "Why'd you stop?"

Roman scowled, "Oh, I don't know, Seth. Maybe it was the fact that I _hurt_ you? Like I said before, you're still in a fragile state - both physically and emotionally - and you weren't ready for this." For a moment, their eyes met, and the frantic electricity pulsing between them was almost palpable. "I won't be the one to hurt you."

"You say that like you think I _want_ to be hurt." Seth said, the accusatory note in his tone not going unnoticed.

A tense moment passed, before Roman ceded, "I never meant for it to come across like that." But that didn't seem to matter. "Can we just go back to the room? Please?"

"No." Seth was biting down on his bottom lip, hard enough to draw blood. "Like I said before, I don't want to be cooped-up in there. I need some fresh air." Reaching across Roman, he jammed his finger down on the emergency stop button. The elevator jumped to life. "And I'm going, whether you come with me or not."

"I told you I'd come with you." Roman reinforced, not about to let Seth wander the streets alone at three in the morning.

"I don't need a babysitter." Seth snarled. His tone was downright _hurtful_ now, accusatory. Like Roman thought Seth really _wanted_ to hurt, like Seth thought that Roman really didn't want him anymore, like Roman thought Seth was really broken... "Why don't you stay behind and take a nap? We all know you need your beauty sleep."

"Don't be a bitch, Seth." Just then, much to Roman's relief, the elevator doors opened. Seth, offering Roman a scathing glare, ran out. Roman sighed, "Seth!"

Roman chased after him, but it was pointless. Seth was shorter and leaner, and therefore, significantly faster. He was out the front doors of the hotel before Roman even made it into the main lobby, and forget about trying to find him in the eerie dark of the slowly encroaching morning. But still, Roman went outside, skidding to a halt outside of the hotel and looking around. Nothing. No identifying markers to hint at which way he could have gone, and no way to tell if he was still running. Even if he _did_ follow one of the potential paths, what if it was the wrong one? Seth could be _miles_ away by then. It would be better to sit and wait for him to come back on his own.

Just then, Roman's cell phone rang. Checking the Caller ID, he was quickly able to identify that the caller was Dean. He pressed accept, grumbling, "Hello?"

_"Where the hell are you?"_ Dean sounded frantic, and Roman had no doubt that he was pacing around the hotel room, already dressed and ready to drive and find wherever the hell they were. _"Is everything okay? Where is Seth? Is Seth okay?"_

"Well, I wouldn't exactly call him 'okay'." A sigh, before he collapsed into one of the metal benches located outside the hotel. "I know he's tired, but he doesn't want to sleep. He got tired of TV, so he wanted to go for a walk. Only, there was this woman with three kids in the elevator, and Seth had a little breakdown."

_"Tell me you know where he is. Tell me that he's out there with you, pacing or something."_

"Well, if that's what you want to hear, then I'm afraid that I'll have to be the bearer of bad news."

_"God, I try to sleep for two hours and everything goes to hell and a fucking hand basket!"_ His tyrannical tirade was disrupted by a rather out-of-place yawn. _"Did he run?"_ Dean asked, receiving a positive answer from Roman. _"Damn it! How far away did he get?"_

Once again, Roman looked this way and that... Seth was nowhere to be found. "I have no idea. He was out the door before I was even in the lobby." Roman's eyes slowly fell closed, remembering their confrontation in the elevator. "He's not in a good place right now."

Dean was silent for several moments, but there was a lot of fussing on the other end of the line. Finally, he came back with "_I'll be downstairs in a few minutes. We need to find him and bring him home... and it'll be faster if we both look. And then, tomorrow, I believe that it's time to have a little chat with Triple H._"

"I'll be waiting out front." They agreed to meet there, and then ended the call.

Dean arrived a short while later, looking rather worse for wear. His usually messy dirty blond curls were strewn in every imaginable direction, there were dark, heavy bags under his light green eyes, and they appeared red and irritated. His pajamas looked a little haphazard - it took Roman a moment to remember that he had been sleeping mostly-naked, and had most likely gotten dressed spur-of-the-moment - and he was wearing slippers instead of shoes. But he was there, and that was what mattered. There were three possible directions Seth could've gone, so they chose two, hoping against hope that he hadn't taken the third route.

Roman started off, feeling the chill particularly strongly through the thin pajamas that he was wearing. He tried calling Seth, but the call went to voicemail... every time he called, the pattern was the same. It had been awhile since their confrontation in the elevator... maybe twenty minutes, perhaps more. Needless to say, Seth couldn't keep up the pace that he had been running for that long. That pace, combined with how exhausted he had been before - Roman wouldn't be surprised if he just crashed somewhere along the line, unable to push his body any harder. It would make him that much harder to locate in the dark.

"Seth!" He didn't know why he was calling out to him - why would he, if he was thinking that Seth had passed out on the side of the road somewhere? But he found himself compelled to do so anyhow, on the off-chance that Seth could somehow hear him. "Seth!.. Seth!.. Seth!.. Seth!.." Nothing.

It wasn't until a half-hour later, when, almost ready to turn back and wait for Seth to come home himself, he got a call from Dean. Not two miles away, Dean had managed to locate Seth. As Roman started to make his way to the location where Dean had found their lover (sitting under a tree in the local park, sobbing and trembling in the dark, all alone), Dean told him that Seth was safe and hadn't tried to hurt himself. The memory of that time, the last time, was still too fresh in their minds. Seth, blinded by grief, had been running, and, distracted, had fallen off of the curb and into the street. He'd broken his arm in the fall, and then the car had come...

When he finally made it to the site where Seth was, he found Dean kneeling beside Seth, gently pulling the two-toned man into his arms and holding him close. Roman walked over to them, looking down at Dean, asking, "Is he coming home?"

Dean pulled back a little, staring into Seth's watery, pain-ridden eyes, before nodding, "Yeah. He's coming home, where he belongs."


End file.
